Posted by: mrdmcday | May 3, 2010

Why is he screwing/toying with me?

The Rundown:

He’s an “off and on” guy. Sometimes we talk a lot, other times we barely talk. Recently, I’ve kinda developed a thing for him. I don’t even know if I really like him or not. I just know we have a connection, whether it’s good friends or more, I don’t know.

He’s toying with me though. He’s a huge flirt. He’s always teasing about us being together, and how much he apparently wants to kiss me (i’m against that. Cause we’re not dating). On and on, he’s pretty much hanging off me sometimes. I think I sometimes like the attention… But that’s just part of it. He’s quite protective it seems, I can’t talk about other guys without him being like “WHOO!!”.

Sometimes we just don’t talk for a while though. It’s like he randomly loses interest for a while. Anyways, we were supposed to hang out today, but he made plans with another person. Other person HAPPENS to be why I’m confused.

He told me the other day, that he pretty much loves this other girl (Which i wouldn’t care, if he wasn’t toying with me. If we were JUST friends, then it wouldn’t bother me). Yet he says, he’s confused because every time he sees me he’s like :O . I asked him what he meant. He explained that when he sees me, he sees a beautiful girl that makes him very happy etc. But in his mind, he can’t figure out if we’re meant to be more, or just best friends.

So apparently he still loves this other girl. Yet he’s toying with me in the mean time. He is NOT dating this other girl by the way. They used to date, and still hang out.

Why is he doing this to me?!

The Response:

Ok. So, from my point of view, there seems like there’s a wealth of emotional, perhaps even sexual, tension. In both of your minds, this is a window of opportunity that no one investigated. But, as we both know, men have much shorter attention spans.

He’s clearly going through something else and is trying find something, someone, to fill this gap or take his mind off of it. Perhaps it’s serious-maybe something abstract like life purpose or something, but he’s drifting wherever the wind takes him. People like that are dangerous when it comes to relationships because they’re so unpredictable.

You say he’s your best friend, so Im giving him the benefit of the doubt and assuming that he isn’t some dog trying to find his next conquest. But, nowadays, the title “bestfriend” has been obscured. Could mean “we’re good friends” or “we’re friends who do it”.

I’m hoping he’s not the latter just trying to lure you in…because that isn’t entirely unheard of…

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